In the interest of sharing life’s ups and downs and in the spirit of spiritual reflection, I’d like to share a short chapter out of my life. Hopefully this helps someone somewhere to realize that it’s not all rainbows and ponies on the Path, but that after experiencing enough One can begin to see all of life’s situations from a higher perspective and develop oneself towards a constant equanimity in the midst of “The Drama“.

After a frustrating situation at work stemming from stress that came to a frustrating and unsatisfying conclusion on this day, I was feeling quite grumpy. I’m not usually a grumpy person, and I have become aware of my own moods and thoughts to the point of seeing that harboring negativity in OneSelf is not helpful or supportive of your own physical & mental health, not to mention your motivation, future, and reality in general. So having this experience and working through it, I’m inspired to write about it. This post is part venting, part showing humanity, and part inspiration for further spiritual development, and part walking the path of life.

One stressful and unpleasant morning after waking up feeling fatigued (I’ve been known to be a workaholic and stay up late working on software projects), I practiced my daily routine of setting off for work trying not to be late. If you’re living in a rural or more peaceful area, count yourself lucky in that respect, for in the stressful city life people have become so masochistic that they have devised a system of living, system of working, and monetary exchange such that we are put into a socio-economic situation and lifestyle where we are encouraged and essentially bred into waking up early to go drive through traffic to work so we can have money for food & living expenses. Well ok, if you’re in a rural area you’re probably in part of that system too, and even can appreciate the benefits that such a system has when compared to living on one’s own. Even if you’re amazingly self-sufficient enough to be off the grid, count yourself even luckier in the aspect of not having to deal with traffic and worry about being late.

To understand my emotions on this day, it’s generally accepted that certain individuals are “morning people”, and some people are not. I don’t count myself as a morning person and never have. I don’t know why that really is, and it’s not that I haven’t tried or that I don’t want to, it’s just the way it had always been for me… or at least that’s what I thought at the time. Sometimes it’s less fatigue and sometimes much more. I’ve tried eating healthier, exercising, alarm clock apps that are aware of sleep cycles, multiple alarms to wake up, multiple alarms to go to sleep early, herbal supplements, vitamins and other supplements, going off caffeine, having some caffeine in the morning only (varying levels from tea to coffee), meditation, binaural beats, music, etc…

On this day, I felt that either I hadn’t come across the right combination, hadn’t been able to sustain it, or was just feeling relatively helpless against it in that moment, but my experience had generally been that my body has always had some level of fatigue in the morning (and I still do). On this morning, it was particularly bad due to working late and I was feeling particularly helpless and frustrated at myself for this chronic problem. At my past two jobs I had managers that were not very supportive of my sleep & morning lateness issue, and had just gotten a new job due to not being able to deal with this amongst other reasons surrounding negative cultural changes at my prior company as well as ethical concerns surrounding top-down command and restructuring practices.

Growing up I’d had bouts of insomnia (sometimes physically crippling due to a compounding of bad eating habits, insomnia, flu, and worrying). I had gotten into collisions due to this issue hurrying, and anxiety about being late (or up late) in the past. (Now that I think of it, mirror cycles of situation had played themselves out once before.)

Anyway, I had been stuck in the bad habit of working late which had been chronically affecting me with a condition of fatigue. So one day after waking up feeling a victim of my own bad habits, I set off for work.

Going to work & turning back due to forgetting my laptop charger, I began to hurry. In the process of hurriedly backing out, I got into a very minor collision (more like “firm tap” with a neighbor in the apartment parking lot. This was thankfully but ironically just after switching car insurance (so you can appreciate the frustration of the situation, and appreciate the mirroring of the concept of the “damaged” and imperfect physical situation). Eventually I ended up
getting a ticket for “unlawful backing” from a police officer and getting into work.

Now you might say that this doesn’t sound all that bad does it? Other than the ticket, no harm done right? Well, from my own unique past experiences and momentary philosophical perspective, it was quite frustrating at the time. I was angry with myself, with the Universe, with whatever sort of imagined “higher power” that caused this situation to happen. Once before, I had gotten into a collision with a bus that nearly missed me, taking out just my side view mirror and front bumper (and before that had been a passenger in many, many other collisions). Most times this had happened before, I thought that God or some higher power or causal event in the Universe beyond my control was responsible for my misfortune. The time before that I had been in a head-on collision with a parked maintenance vehicle which totaled my car, but I was unharmed. Each time I’ve come out unscathed yet with a slightly larger list of things that insurance companies care about because they can use them as statistical reasons for charging you more money. So really the frustration at this time was with being denied a clean record and lower bill for a bit longer, yet with a gratefulness that I wasn’t harmed. Additionally, I had what some might call premonitory thoughts before each accident. Earlier on in life, I didn’t understand the principles of the Law of Attraction. This morning and at this time, I did. However, now the frustration was with myself having attracted this, and being aware of it which was a deeper philosophical frustration at the situation, and the confluence of forces which resulted in this happening. My bumper was a physical reflection of this in it’s ever-so-slightly skewed position. I ended up going through the insurance reporting process and got the ticket, then went to work.

I had realized at this time that the earlier collisions I had experienced throughout life were all attracted by me, whether I was conscious of this fact or not. In fact, the one just prior with the bus was very much due to my thoughts about my habitual life tendency to throw myself in front of the proverbial bus so that others could be protected or somehow be helped. I literally found myself in this situation, yet curiously remained unharmed.

Weeks later, I found myself reflecting again (pun intended) on this experience. I was frustrated at the very minor off-kilter bumper which my car now had. When I say “very minor”, I mean hardly noticeable… a slight 5 degree slant with a max distance from where the bumper should have been of about 2-3 centimeters. Anyway, I found myself thinking about the prior fender bender and thought something like this to myself “if I can attract an accident, then I can attract it being fixed too!”, or “if the Universal laws harmed my bumper, then the Universe can fix it too”. I thought this while at a stoplight just before getting home. A couple weeks later, I then found myself at the same stoplight. This day it was below freezing, but lightly snowing and the roads were icy. I was stopped there just waiting for it to turn green, happy to be 2 blocks from home on such a cold day. Just before the light turned green, I saw the truck behind me getting closer. I lightly let my foot off the brake just as I felt a very abrupt lurch forward. The driver behind me had thought the light was turning green and had stepped on the gas too early! She got out and apologized as I looked at the vehicles for any signs of damage. There was none! In fact, my car’s bumper was now fixed and in it’s proper place snug against the rest of the car! I saw no noticeable damage on either vehicle, and we both agreed that there was no need to bother with insurance. We both got back in our respective vehicles and went on our way.

There are many lessons to be learned here. First of all, don’t let life or time push you around. In an increasingly congested socio-economic world, it’s important to take the time for OneSelf to slow down, breathe, regain focus and most of all take your time! Rushing while being in a flustered emotional state gets you nowhere but anxious and in collisions. I also believe the other spiritual lesson here (and earlier in life) for me was that although it might feel like the right thing to do to put oneself through suffering in order to help others, this is a foolish and undesirable thing to do. However, just like my physical vehicle was damaged… the physical body, the “I” that I identified myself with, walked away unscathed each time. Now this metaphor can probably be applied to the physical body, the “vehicle” which we identify ourselves with in this life also. Just like the car, although our physical bodies may end up damaged at some point in our lives, the Real You, the “I” which is beyond the physical body, remains undamaged. Likewise, the ego or intellect “I”… the thoughts and beliefs we identify ourselves with are not really us either. Even if we feel we are “emotionally damaged” or “psychically damaged” in some way or due to some trauma, the Real Us is never damaged and remains unharmed. Now, this is not to say that we should seek out situations where we might put ourselves in harm’s way just to play the hero! On the contrary, this is to say that being the hero in such a situation can be very foolish. Although, according to the ideas presented by Alan Watts, it’s the game or drama we like to play with ourselves sometimes. The first step is deciding what type of game you’d rather prefer. Also, what type of thoughts or beliefs we’d rather hold in our intellect self. These “habits of being” also affect One’s reality and manifested experiences. It is part of the game of waking up and enlightenment to realize the importance of what we really want to choose to focus on and think about.

Finally, I’d like to share a wonderfully artistic video with you, narrated by the One and Only, Alan Watts:

After learning about the Law of Attraction (Law of Correspondence) and how “like attracts like”, something kept bugging me.  From my physics background, I knew that positive attracts negative, and you could say that “like repels like” when speaking about electrical charges, or magnetic poles.  Combining these two concepts seemed very paradoxical.  How does God join Meta-Physics and Physics in a graceful way?

I recently came across a very intriguing video on youtube that visually conceptualizes the Past/Future space-time continuum, matter, and the hermetic laws, with deep symbolism in the great pyramid and sacred geometry encoded holographically^[1] within as well.  Let’s not get lost in the HisStory though.  There is so much correlated information there that it would take a long time to delve into it, (my little self doesn’t fully understand it all completely yet either, and how could the infinite ever be completely comprehended?) however let’s focus on conceptually resolving the current paradox using the graph of Future & Past presented at 15:46.

As we know, the Law of Attraction is another name for the Hermetic Law of Correspondence.  This law can be summarized as “As above, so below” or “as inside, so outside”.  This transcendental property is used in the context of the LOA as a way to attract what One wants from the future into the present moment, and then as we experience it, it passes into the past.  However, we also could say that all of future, present and past are contained within the Field of All Possibility.  To the human mind, this concept is difficult to wrap one’s head around, and confusion and disorientation can result (ie: What’s past, present, & future?  Where/When/Who am I?).  For this reason, we understand our reality to flow in one direction from Future –> Present –> Past.   To God/Higher Self/Source,  in His higher perspective, all 3 are seen and known.

How is it that if on one level “like attracts like”, and on another “opposites attract”?  The confusion arises when we don’t see the paradox from the Higher perspective.  To understand, we must shift to another perspective.  Let’s consider the Law of Polarity as a reflection of the physical “opposites attract” pattern we observe.  This law states that “opposites are the same differing only in degree“.  The degree concept is important.  The potential is realized between the two ends of the spectrum as the electrons move on their journey.  On the quantum level all matter and form is simply vibration of Energy at different frequencies.  For example, the color Red (400–484 THz) is a lower vibrational frequency than Violet (668–789 THz), yet they are both photons vibrating at different frequencies.  We can study the electromagnetic and visible light spectrum to see that this is the case.

Fig. 2: Diagram of a battery with a polymer separator.A battery acts as a charge separator.  Voltage is the measured Potential Energy between the two +/- terminals.
Source: Wikipedia

In physics we observe that negative attracts positive.  Let’s visualize this as a battery (charge separator).  The potential Voltage we measure is because we have separated the charges.  The negatively charged electrons want to move towards the positive terminal to equalize and zero out the difference in charge.  Usually we put some load between the terminals of the circuit in order to serve our purposes.  This load has some non-zero resistance R to the flow of current.

Going back to the metaphysical viewpoint, we can equate “Resistance to the Flow” to our negative or limiting beliefs, thoughts and subconscious habits of being.  However, interestingly enough… it’s commonly through learning how to lower our resistance that we are able to find the most knowledge and value.  In this respect, when we see our “negative” resistance as a learning tool, then many good things can come out of it!  Indeed, by studying Newton’s Third Law in physics (see Hermetic Law of Cause and Effect in ‘meta-physics’) we can see that this is also true in that realm.  For example, movement is only possible by having a resistance to push against.  In order to evolve on our life journey and move forward, we must have some resistance to our force/intention to “push against”, transcend, and overcome.

Update 2012-10-19: It is also important to notice the parallel in the metaphor I present in the battery example.  The ‘separation’ of charge yields an apparent duality, which is the result of the separation.  Without the separation of charge, the electrons would not move on their journey, and the Voltage between the two terminals would be 0.  Likewise, if we were born without ego and the belief of separation from everything, there would be no journey of realization… we would already just be in a state of knowing.  In meta-physics and spirituality, this separation is the ego’s thought, behavior, and belief patterns resulting from the illusion of it’s separation from God.

By no means am I advocating for more creation of duality or separation.  There is already enough suffering in the world.  My purpose here is to hopefully shed some Light on the separated situation we find ourselves in, and in doing so, giving it meaning and value so that we may move past it gracefully.  In doing so, we must move towards a more Beneficent, Symbiotic, and Love/Compassion based system, and away from the old dualistic, predatory, parasitic system.

[1]: “When a photograph is cut in half, each piece shows half of the scene. When a hologram is cut in half, the whole scene can still be seen in each piece. This is because, whereas each point in a photograph only represents light scattered from a single point in the scene, each point on a holographic recording includes information about light scattered from every point in the scene.” Source: Hologram Wiki Page

(Originally written 12/9/2011; edited and completed 6/27/2012; Links Fixed on 12/14/2012)

I know it’s been a while since I was inspired to write a Life-related post (or any post in general), but today I found a muse… here goes.

This morning, I meditated upon waking.  In my inner silence I resided in a calm formless darkness as small thoughts bubbled up to my consciousness.  I was rather good today at maintaining focus and non-thought, and nothing was able to distract me from my goal.  After about 25-30 minutes, I began my intentions.  I sent out my wishes to the Universe, and felt them resonate deeply within me.  I felt the desire within, through my emotions, and I visualized them in my mind’s eye.  At this time, my visualizations were somewhat unclear.  I tried to visualize an ideal living space out of mostly nothing, but thoughts and memories of other places I’ve been filled my mind’s eye.  I focused on the aspects and qualities of those places that I most loved, and made those my intention.  After doing the intention, I calmed my mind again for a minute or so, then opened my eyes and started my day.

On the drive to work, it was very foggy.  At first it seemed cloudy and gray… I could not see the sun very well through the clouds close to my current residence.  Once I got on the highway, the sun became apparent through the fog.  At one point it was so brilliant that it lit up the fog, piercing through and filling it with light, yet still hidden as a blurred glow.  The corona around it was blooming with light; I’m sure the cars going the other way on the highway could probably see colorful spectra and rainbow-like colors in the air surrounding it.  I turned onto the on-ramp, back to the sun, and started on my path towards work.  The road ahead was still foggy and reminded me of a dream-like state.  Beautiful music poured out of my car speakers as I drove through my dreamland, perfectly awake and aware.  I was aware of the road ahead, I was used to making this journey and knew the way.  As I got closer, the fog began to fade… the path ahead crystallized and came into form.  I passed a car that had been in an accident,  a signpost on the way to remind me to be careful.  I made it to work on time.

As I was making the drive, I realized that it very well fit the metaphors and concepts that have been coming into my realization and life lately.  When doing intention or creating new things in our lives, it is difficult to simply conjure them out of thin air.  As we guide our vessel through life, the path ahead is sometimes foggy and unclear, filled with the unknown, dangers along the way, and our fears.  To move past them, we must focus on where we want to go or what we want to create.  We must look at our past, focus on the aspects or things that we most loved, the good, and sometimes the aspects of the bad things that we can transform into good by learning from these experiences.  We must create the new things in our lives out of these ideas.  This iterative and perpetual process of crystallization of ideas is what I liken to an ‘alchemical’ process of the mind.  We are each a single expression of the Great Mind of the Universe, and so for us we cannot see the whole picture all of the time.  We combine the elements, concepts, ideas, qualities, and processes that work best for us to create the most wonderful forms and effects in the real world that we can.  This is very vague and general, but it applies to any field (ie: intention, chemistry, art, programming, engineering, teaching, etc…)

There is an astounding amount of places in the universe where we can see these progressive evolving patterns.  The Universe is a massive fractal of beautiful patterns!  One of these is the Fibonacci sequence, and can be seen in many places in nature.  A common example in nature is found in the sneezewort plant.  This plant grows its branches in a Fibonacci pattern. For example: first 1 branch, then 2, then 1+2=3, then 2+3=5, 5+3=8, 8+5=13, etc…)  Reflecting on this we may ask the question: “How does the plant know how to grow in this way?”  It appears that this is just essentially the plant’s nature, which is stored in it’s DNA.  It can also be said that it is the plant’s pattern of being.  However, since it follows this additive pattern we could deduce that it looks at it’s past developed branches, and adds them to determine how to grow in it’s future.

Drunvalo Melchizedek puts it this way:

“When the plant adds it’s past, 3, to it’s present, 5, it knows where the future is, and it knows exactly that the number is 8. And this is the situation that humanity is in right now. It’s like, we are, the modern world is like, 5 right now, and it doesn’t know where it’s going. It’s completely disconnected from it’s past. And when it reconnects with it’s past, which is what’s about to happen on Earth, when it does reconnect with it’s past, it then remembers the ancient world. And when it adds the ancient world to the modern world, it knows exactly where it’s supposed to go. We have to know where our consciousness is going to expand to. And we can’t know that without the ancient world. It’s essential, It’s not an option, we have to. And the ancient world is completely prepared, they’re ready, they know they need us. And, um, but we just don’t know we need them.”

Sources:
Serpent of Light – Movement of Earth Kundalini to Chile?

The Maya Of Eternal Time Drunvalo Melchizedek 2009 4 of 14

This statement is key to the analogy: “When the plant adds it’s past, 3, to it’s present, 5, it knows where the future is, and it knows exactly that the number is 8”   It looks at it’s past and combines them together to determine the future!  This is an example of the alchemical (sexuality) aspect of the creation process of the Universe.  We can see another example of this creation process in the trigrams and hexagrams of the I Ching.  The Yin and Yang aspects combine to form many combinations.  We combine these combinations to produce 64 hexagrams.  If you are not familiar with the I Ching, but are familiar with binary code, you can see essentially the same process as we add more bits to represent larger and larger numbers.  For any given number of bits, we combine the Yin (0) and Yang (1) ad-infinitum to produce all combinations of zero and one that fit in this space.  Eventually, we keep adding more bits until we can represent all the numbers stretching out towards infinity.  Even the concepts of Dark (Yin) and Light (Yang) complement each other to produce all the colors we can see on our displays ( in hex #000000 = black and #FFFFFF = white ).  All of manifest reality is dual in nature, and with a trained eye, One can spot the Yin and Yang at play in anything.

Each pair of opposites complements the other. Light and Dark, Left and Right, Front and Back, Acid and Base, Hot and Cold, East and West, Summer and Winter, Past and Future, Order and Chaos;  One cannot truly understand one part without the other for contrast.  Without contrast, things would deteriorate into sameness.  Without balance, things would deteriorate into extremes and self-annihilate.  The key is balance.

“On one level, when there is an antagonistic relationship between opposites this leads to destruction. However, from the larger perspective, the balance of Nature is always maintained.”

Source: https://web.archive.org/web/20121210231452/http://asiarecipe.com:80/cuisine-evolution/yin-yang.html

This can be seen in many ways, but the one humanity (especially the West) struggles with most is the ‘good’ vs. ‘evil’ duality principle. One way to begin understanding and reconciling this is that each contains a part (potential) of the other, either manifest or unmanifest.  If you look at either one side of the paradox, it does not make sense because it is a half-truth.  To solve the riddle, we must pull each complementary pair together in the middle. For good vs. evil, the answer is Unconditional Love. For Unconditional Love to exist philosophically or religiously speaking, one must learn to love one’s enemy as Jesus taught.  For to put any condition upon love through the polaric lens of  separation does not make it Unconditional by simple definition.  This divine dance has played out throughout history, with archetypes tracing back all the way to ancient Greece and beyond.   The interplay can be seen in the movie the Dark Knight.  If You truly think about it… Batman would not be such a great and amazing hero if there weren’t an equally opposing evil force like ‘the Joker’, now would he?  However, One must notice that he is not allcompletely and totally good (Yin) himself.  (Remember also: Each contains an aspect of the other, and each of these aspects can be further separated into Yin and Yang principles as well towards infinity.)

“One must transcend from the duality of ‘for’ and ‘against’ into one organic unity which is without distinctions.” – Bruce Lee